Silly Ninja

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Old Man Wisdom

Posted on 08.13.08 3:29PM under Funny News

We sat with a man on the verge of turning 60 and he shed some knowledge on us for the decades to come. Consider this the crystal ball of your future.

His principle: THE FIVE H’s

Hard-on:

For guys in their 20’s. Basically follow your dick. This is the time in life that you are able to make mistakes and should take any and all action that is thrown at you. If you are in a relationship and a hot girl is interested in you follow your hard-on and go after her. You won’t have the stamina or energy later in life so live it up while you can.

Heart:

For guys in their 30’s. You fooled around and had your fun and now you want to settle down. It is time to follow your heart and start a family if you want to or pursue some of your other dreams you may have.

Head:

For guys in their 40’s. Now you finally start to get daily epiphanies about life. Your understanding of women, relationships, and family life all start to grow and you become more logical and rational. Your reasoning improves and you can start giving advice to others around.

Health:

For guys in their 50’s. You’ve chased every piece of tail for a decade, you’ve settled down and maybe had a kid or two, and you have finally gained some wisdom so now your primary goal is to preserve that and stay healthy. You start to focus on what you are eating and try to workout daily. You don’t want to be that guy getting pushed around in the wheelchair so get off your ass and do something about it.

Happiness:

For guys in their 60’s. You can laugh at yourself and those adolescents around you. You can stare at younger girls in their 20’s and they don’t care. You can shed knowledge to youth but they probably won’t listen and you get to laugh when they make mistakes that could have been avoided. Youth truly is wasted on the young.

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