Silly Ninja
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Old Man Wisdom
[ No Comments ] Posted on 08.13.08 under Funny News
We sat with a man on the verge of turning 60 and he shed some knowledge on us for the decades to come. Consider this the crystal ball of your future.
His principle: THE FIVE H’s
Hard-on:
For guys in their 20’s. Basically follow your dick. This is the time in life that you are able to make mistakes and should take any and all action that is thrown at you. If you are in a relationship and a hot girl is interested in you follow your hard-on and go after her. You won’t have the stamina or energy later in life so live it up while you can.
Heart:
For guys in their 30’s. You fooled around and had your fun and now you want to settle down. It is time to follow your heart and start a family if you want to or pursue some of your other dreams you may have.
Head:
For guys in their 40’s. Now you finally start to get daily epiphanies about life. Your understanding of women, relationships, and family life all start to grow and you become more logical and rational. Your reasoning improves and you can start giving advice to others around.
Health:
For guys in their 50’s. You’ve chased every piece of tail for a decade, you’ve settled down and maybe had a kid or two, and you have finally gained some wisdom so now your primary goal is to preserve that and stay healthy. You start to focus on what you are eating and try to workout daily. You don’t want to be that guy getting pushed around in the wheelchair so get off your ass and do something about it.
Happiness:
For guys in their 60’s. You can laugh at yourself and those adolescents around you. You can stare at younger girls in their 20’s and they don’t care. You can shed knowledge to youth but they probably won’t listen and you get to laugh when they make mistakes that could have been avoided. Youth truly is wasted on the young.
Friday Bombshell: Nina Moric
[ No Comments ] Posted on 08.08.08 under Girls
We hope this puts a smile on your face and gets you pumped for the weekend. Get out there, get your party on, and make a fool of yourself tryin’ to land a hottie like this.
Cheers!
Brilliant Kid Exploits Pedofiles For Easy Cash
[ No Comments ] Posted on 08.08.08 under Funny News
An innovative teenager in Sweden thought up a brilliant plan to get two great things accomplished at once: screwing over old, perverted guys that prey on underage girls and making himself a hefty chunk of pocket change in the meantime. Here’s how he did it…
First, the 16-year-old boy set up a website soliciting video feeds of naughty, underage girls via webcam. In order for the creepers to be able to view the videos, they would first need to submit their personal ID numbers, bank account details and internet bank codes. The boy would then rape their accounts and make out like a bandit. Needless to say, there were never any videos for the men to watch.
Next comes the best part…
The kid would then write a letter to each of these idiots from a different e-mail account, using the identity of a police investigator on the hunt for internet sex offenders. He told the men that they had been reported for sex offenses and, again, requested their banking information in order to investigate the charges further. He told them that as long as he didn’t discover anything suspicious that he would leave them alone. Then the boy would steal even more money from these guys’ accounts. He ended up making over $10,000.
This scheme is brilliant because the kid was taking advantage of people that he knew wouldn’t want to inform the police of his crime. Eventually though, his luck ran out. One of the men he had scammed went to the cops and the boy was eventually arrested. Although he was convicted on 10 counts of fraud, he walked with only 80 hours of community service. We don’t think he even had to pay the money back.
Either way, we’ve come to the conclusion that this kid is definitely going to strike it rich, one way or another. He possesses the kind of outside-of-the-box thinking that makes all self-made millionaires what they are.
Well played sir!
The Ass Bra
[ No Comments ] Posted on 08.07.08 under Funny News, Funny Pics
Yes you read it correctly. They have developed a new “bra” that makes a chick’s ass look better. Now when you’re making out with that girl with the hourglass figure you’ll have to unhook her bra, remove her corset and unhook her ass bra…but be careful the clip is near the hole (the one she constantly denies you).
Women wear so many gimmicks that it is hard to tell if that “8″ is really an “8.” They wear high heels to make their legs look longer, makeup to fix up their face, bras to make them look younger and more supple (for lack of a better word), and now they have designed an ass contraption to make them look like they’ve been waking up and doing yoga every morning for the past year. Is this really the beast that we’ve created?
Ladies, it is not fair to us that you are misleading us with your looks. Sure you look like a knockout at night all done up, but remember this, we have to wake up and see the deterioation that took place over night and it is never pretty. Less is more, and if you aren’t naturally hot; well work with what you’ve got or actually be that chick doing yoga every morning. Trust us, we’re going to see the rolls and dimples once your ass bra is off so if you are that insecure about it get your ass out of the bra and into the gym.
That’s Just Wrong
[ 1 Comment ] Posted on 08.06.08 under Funny Pics
I’m sure this champion highly regretted his night of belligerence when he awoke the next day and discovered this photo. As you can see, his “buddies” messed with him pretty bad. They nestled the banana between his pasty white butt cheeks, illegibly tatted his face and arms with permanent red marker, and of course wrote “fags welcome” in size 42 font across his ass (along with a big green arrow pointing toward his glory hole)… Poor bastard!
Say What?
[ 1 Comment ] Posted on 08.04.08 under Funny News, Tech Info
As you probably know, Apple offers iPhone and iPod Touch owners the option of downloading applications (games, news, weather, sports, etc.) from the iTunes App Store in order to bolster their users’ product enjoyment. A new game was released to the App Store on Friday called “Oxxo.” We’ve read the “Oxxo” application description as it appears in the App Store and we still have absolutely no idea what the F it’s all about. It’s quite hilarious to be honest! Take your best shot at deciphering this description… (we have not altered this AT ALL)
The full game description appears after the break.
Krystal Forscutt
[ No Comments ] Posted on 08.04.08 under Girls
We here at Silly Ninja are dedicated to our mission of searching for undiscovered talent. In this case, we’re bringing this talent to you in the form of a RIDICULOUSLY hot bombshell of a woman!
Wipe the drool off of your chin and get back to work!
